


Help Me

by anime_haikyuu_simp_94



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Drug Abuse, Gay, M/M, Physical Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-05
Updated: 2020-11-05
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:54:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 6,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27396067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anime_haikyuu_simp_94/pseuds/anime_haikyuu_simp_94
Summary: Iwaizumi Hajime had the most ridiculous, annoying, and adorable boyfriend in the world. Oikawa Tooru was certainly full of surprises. The two boys made an amusing duo, but all is thrown into the air when Iwaizumi discovers a terrible secret.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 1
Kudos: 40





	1. Chapter 1

Iwaizumi POV 

Iwaizumi Hajime watched from the crowd as his very talented boyfriend won another volleyball match. Oikawa Tooru had mad skills, and he Iwaizumi was very proud of him. He climbed down the stairs and waited right outside the gym for his boyfriend to emerge. The sound of many chattering girls caused I'm to smile and turn around. There Oikawa stood, holding a volleyball, completely surrounded by fangirls. 

"Ahh ladies~ I'm so honored~" the brunette winked and made a peace sign, his iconic pose.

"Oikawa senpai!! I love you!!" 

"Oh and I love that you love me~" 

Iwaizumi rolled his eyes. Ridiculous. Why was he dating that freak? Oh yeah, cause he loved him. He gently stepped between two girls and smacked Oikawa on the arm. 

"Hey! Iwa-chan~ so mean~" 

"Stop flirting and let's go home" he grabbed the male by the shirt and tugged him away. 

"Bye ladies~ hope you come to the next game!" 

"I said, stop flirting." 

"I'm not! I just invited them to the next game" Oikawa pouted. "Is Iwa-chan jealous?" 

"No Shittykawa, now shut up." 

They walked hand in hand to Iwaizumi's house. It was dark already and neither of them had eaten dinner. 

"Ahh I'm so tired, and oh so very hungry." his boyfriend groaned. 

"You're a baby." he rolled his eyes. again. 

"Am I, your baby~?" 

"Uhh disgusting, come kiss me." he apparently didn't have to ask twice because Oikawa quickly gave him a peck on the lips. It was a tease, and it drove him crazy. "You call that a kiss? pathetic." 

"Oh, you asked for it." Oikawa wrapped his arms around Iwaizumi's neck and kissed him roughly, their tongues finding their way into each others mouths. His body got hot, and he broke apart, gasping for air. 

"Not so bad, Tooru. I'd give you more, but I'm starving." 

His boyfriend smirked. "You can eat me, Iwa-chan~" 

"Oh my god, whore. Go lay on my bed and think about what you've done." He grabbed left overs from the fridge and set them on the table. 

"Can I have some dinner first?" 

"Absolutely not. You're being punished for being horny. Now go to bed." he took a bite of his noodles. 

"Iwa-chan~ please~" Oikawa sat down at the table and dug into the food. 

"Not like you listen to me, anyways. Fucker." 

After much more playful arguing, they settled into bed. Iwaizumi rolled onto his side, suddenly exhausted. A warm hand settled on his waist as his boyfriend cuddled up next to him. He would never say it out loud, but he very much enjoyed being the little spoon. He felt warm and safe in those strong arms. 

"Too tired to eat me, Iwa-chan?" 

"Shh I'm enjoying this moment of fluff, don't ruin it shittykawa." 

"Aww, you like it when we cuddle?" 

"I would never say such a sentimental thing. Now let me sleep in peace."


	2. Chapter 2

Oikawa POV 

Oikawa Tooru lost another set for his team. They were going to lose this game and it was going to be all his fault. "I'm sorry!" 

"Don't mind! You'll get the next one!" 

His teammates were always understanding and supportive, but he was still ashamed of himself. No matter how hard he tried he always fell short. He could practice for hours, and yet people were always better than him. He tried so hard to not compare himself to others, but he couldn't help himself. He shook his head. He needed to focus on the game. 

It didn't matter. They lost anyways. He shook the other teams hands, muttering "good game" to the the players. He stopped at the last person. Ushijima held his hand out to him. He scowled. "Good game..." 

"You played well today Oikawa." 

"Oh, like you care." 

"I am being honest." 

"Fuck off." Oikawa turned away and went straight to the locker room. One of his teammates approached him. 

"In a bad mood?" 

"I don't want to talk about it." 

"Fine, but I just wanted to say that you did good today." 

"I- ugh, thanks." 

After a talk with the coach about ways they can improve for next season, Oikawa left, his mood as dark as the stormy clouds on the sky. His group of fangirls spotted him and began walking towards him. He did not have the patience to deal with them right now. So he ran. 

Iwaizumi called out to him. "Oi! Dumbass! Wait for me!" 

He slowed down and paused, trying to catch his breath. 

"Why the fuck are you running away like that?" His boyfriend gave him a concerned look. 

He panted. "Didn't.. want to talk.. to girls..." 

"Ohhh, so you're a dumbass and a coward now." 

Oikawa glared at Iwaizumi. "I'm not in the mood, so don't test me." 

"Oh. Are you ok?" 

"I'm fine." 

"Is it because you lost to Ushijima again?" 

Leave it to Iwaizumi to know exactly how he felt. "....yeah." 

"That man is a monster, I don't know how he does it."

Oikawa clenched his teeth, frustration building inside him. "Karasuno beat him. Tobio beat him. Why can't I?" 

"I have no idea. Seriously Tooru, you're very skilled and talented and it doesn't make sense." 

He let out a big sigh. "Thanks.. Iwa-chan..."

"Would a heated make-out session make you feel better?" 

"Are you attempting to flirt with me?" 

"No, I never flirt. Waste of time. You're too stupid to notice anyways." 

"Ahh so mean~" his mood had started to improve, but he still felt awful deep down. Nothing ever seemed to be able to make his pain and disappointment in himself go away. 

...Nothing he would admit to. Once arrived at Iwaizumi's apartment, Oikawa snuck into the small storage space. His boyfriend was sound asleep, but he shut the door behind him just in case. Turning on his phone's flashlight, he began to dig around a small box in the back of the room. A small zip lock bag sat hidden behind some books. He pulled it out, examining the contents. There was only a tiny bit of the white powder left. Damn, he needed to get more. He closed the box and snuck into the kitchen. He poured the contents of the bag into a measuring spoon. Ah, just enough left. Quickly snorting the drug, an awful burning filling his nostrils, Oikawa threw the bag away and washed the measuring spoon. 

Iwaizumi could not know what he was doing. He was ashamed, but why did it matter? He was a big failure anyways, might as well add drug addict to the list. Slowly he felt the high begin, his pains and all his emotions going away. He felt, good. Great. Like he could rule the world. And he also felt like the world was spinning. A common side effect that he was used to by now. 

A sleepy Iwaizumi sat up when he walked back into the bedroom. "Where've you been?" 

"Bathroom." 

"Oh, come back to bed... idiot..." His boyfriend yawned, and fell back asleep almost immediately. Oikawa climbed into bed and cuddled his love, he wasn't going to be able to sleep, not when he was high like this. But he would snuggle, and pretend like everything was ok. He was good at that. Pretending. Lying. Putting on a show. He hated it, but that was who he was. A fake. 


	3. Chapter 3

Iwaizumi POV 

Iwaizumi lazily opened the fridge. He had intended to get a soda but there were none in there. "Damn it... Tooru? Did you drink all the soda again?" 

"....No I don't drink soda" his boyfriend stumbled into the kitchen, just having woken up from a nap. 

"Sleep good?" 

"Fine." 

Something was off about Oikawa. He'd been acting different the past few weeks, and Iwaizumi wasn't sure why. The man he loved was not his usual joyful self, and that bothered him. But everytime he tried to ask, Oikawa would just shrug it off or change the subject. Not to mention, the brunette was sleeping a lot more than he used to during the day. Oikawa never used to take naps. It was all so strange, and he was at a loss. 

"Tooru, what's bothering you?" 

"Oh god, not this again. I told you, I'm fine." 

"You don't sound or act fine.... I'm kinda worried about you." 

His boyfriend rolled his eyes. "Oh please, you're not a softie like that." 

Iwaizumi was serious. "Bitch, what you want me to say? Shittykawa I'm fucking worried about you? Is that better?" 

"Yeah that sounds more like you~" Oikawa winked at him. Wow, he was gonna play like that? 

"You choose this time to be flirtatious? You are something else, Oikawa Tooru." he walked over and gave his boyfriend a hug. 

"Oh Iwa-chan~ you have grown soft on me~" 

"Oh shut up I have not." 

Oikawa's phone rang and he quickly answered it. Iwaizumi waited, leaning his head against the broad shoulder next to him. 

"That was my coach he wants to talk to the team about next season." 

"Oh alright. Good luck. I'll cook something, no I'll order something for dinner." He pulled away and handed Oikawa his volleyball bag. "Hurry back" 

"I will" 

\----------------------------------------------------------

Iwaizumi waited. And waited. And waited some more for Oikawa to come home. It was dark, and his food was cold. How long was this going to take? At midnight he called it quits and went to bed. Something didn't seem right, but he trusted Oikawa. He had almost fallen asleep when the front door opened and shut. He scrambled out of bed and into the kitchen. 

"Why so late?" 

Oikawa stumbled into the room, leaning against the wall. His words were slurred, and slow. "Team went out to get drinks." 

"Oh my god Tooru you're wasted. C'mon let's get you to bed." 

"No no, I'm fine~" 

"It wasn't a question, now come to bed." He grabbed the drunk man and pulled him into their room. Oikawa just stood there, staring off into space. "Aren't you going to get your pajamas on? or do you plan to sleep in that?" No response. In fact, his boyfriend's eyes were closed and his body was... falling! Iwaizumi caught Oikawa and layed him down on the bed. 

"Iwa-chan~" 

"What?" 

"When did you dye your hair blue? it's very pretty." 

"Oh for the love of- just go to sleep. please?" he threw the blanket over the invalid, and climbed in next to him. 

"Iwa-"

"SLEEP TOORU" 

\----

The next morning Iwaizumi received a text from one of the boys on Oikawa's team, asking him how he was. He responded "Good, how was drinks last night?" the boy texted back "what are you talking about?" 

That was odd. Something definitely was wrong here. "Tooru told me the team went for drinks last night." 

"No we didn't." 

That was very odd indeed. He would have to ask Oikawa about that when he woke up.


	4. Chapter 4

Oikawa POV 

Oikawa's head throbbed when he woke up. The lights seemed to burn his eyes. Just how much did he drink last night? He hadn't intended to get so drunk, he had only wanted to make the pain gp away. The man he had been buying drugs from had gotten arrested, and so Oikawa had turned to alcohol whenever he was having withdrawals. It didn't exactly help, but it was better than nothing. He needed to find a way to get more cocaine somehow. He was losing his mind without it. 

He stumbled into the kitchen, looking for a glass of water. What time was it? He couldn't tell, and his head hurt too much for him to seek out a clock. It didn't matter the time, he would just drink some water and go back to bed. 

"Finally awake?" Iwaizumi's voice startled him and he turned around. His boyfriend looked angry, well angrier than usual. 

"Yeah, but my head hurts... I'm going back to bed." he chugged his glass of water and tossed the glass into the sink. 

"Where the fuck where you yesterday?" 

"I told you, coach wanted to talk to the team." he had told him that, right? His head was pounding and it made it difficult to remember which lie he had used. 

"Yeah like hell you were. I've got a text from your teammate saying that you didn't. So why don't you tell me the truth this time?" 

Ah fuck. "I went to a bar, ok? I was tired and grumpy and wanted a drink or two." 

"A drink or two? You came home almost unconscious, you were so drunk. And then you slept for almost twenty hours! What is going on with you?" Iwaizumi stepped closer to him, grabbing his hand. "You can talk to me, Tooru." 

He yanked his hand away. "There's nothing to talk about! I got drunk once! Lots of people drink without anything being wrong with them! I'm FINE!" 

"Oikawa Tooru you are not fine. You never, ever, have yelled at me like that before and I don't like it." 

His headache became more fierce and it made him want to scream. "Well maybe I don't like it when you ask me EVERY SINGLE DAY IF I'M OK! I TOLD YOU I'M FINE! GET OFF OF MY BACK!" He ran into their room and slammed the door. He was so angry! Iwaizumi didn't understand what it felt like. To be so broken and worthless. To feel like the whole world hates you, and is trying to make your life miserable. He needed to feel empty, he needed to get that high again. His body trembled, and he started to sob. When had his life become like this? 

\---------------------------------------------------

He woke up in the middle of the night, all alone. Where was Iwaizumi? He sat up, his headache finally gone. "Iwa-chan?" No answer. He quickly walked out into the hall. "Iwa-chan? Where are you?" He checked the front room. Iwaizumi was asleep on the couch. "Iwa-chan?" 

The boy stirred. One eye opened. "What?" 

"You uh... I'm.. Im sorry for yelling at you. I didn't mean what I said. Please come to bed." 

A sigh. "Fine. But promise me you'll never get drunk again. I hated that so much." 

That was not exactly something Oikawa could do. At least not until he obtained more cocaine. But he had to make Iwaizumi believe that he was ok. "Yeah I promise. It won't happen again." 

"Good. Let's go back to bed then." His boyfriend got up and grabbed his hand. "I'm glad you're sober and feeling better." 

"Yeah...feeling much better." Now if only that were true.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Small warning: this chapter contains slightly graphic sex

Iwaizumi POV 

Iwaizumi waited in the foyer of the doctors office. Oikawa had returned to volleyball practice last week, and yesterday he had injured his knee again. Nothing too serious he hoped. If Oikawa was told he couldn't play, he would be devastated. The brunette had been going through a hard time lately, Iwaizumi could tell. Taking volleyball from the boy would make it even worse. 

The doctor and Oikawa came back out of the office. Iwaizumi stood and crossed to his boyfriend. "What's the news?" 

"Oikawa here just dislocated his knee. I've put it back into place, and prescribed him some pain medicine. He should back to normal in a week or so." the doctor handed some paperwork to the receptionist and left. 

"Can you play?" he knew that that was what was most important to Oikawa. 

"He said I can if I feel like I should. Told me not to play tomorrow to rest up." 

"Oh well that's good." 

"Yeah... Let's go to the pharmacist and get this prescription." 

"Sounds good." 

After picking up the medicine, they drove to their favorite beach. Iwaizumi figured his boyfriend could use a break. The ocean was calming, and he hoped it would ease some of Oikawa's worries. 

"What are we doing here, Iwa-chan?" 

"Thought we could use a break." 

A smile. "That sounds nice." 

Once on the beach, they layed down in the shade on a blanket he had brought. Iwaizumi scooted closer to Oikawa and put an arm around his shoulders. "I love you, Tooru." 

"You.. what? You never say stuff like that. Who are you and what did you do to my boyfriend?" 

He smirked. "Threw you off, did I? Fine. I hate you, you Jack ass." 

"Oh that's just harsh. My heart is broken now Iwa-chan." 

Oh he had missed this. They hadn't been playful like this in awhile. He had been too worried about Oikawa to tease him. To be honest, he was still very worried about him. He hardly smiled anymore. At least not a real smile, the brunette liked to fake his happiness. Iwaizumi could tell. While Oikawa's mouth would be smiling, he could see in those brown eyes the pain. His boyfriend was hurting inside, but no matter what he said or did, he couldn't find out what it was. 

"Hey, Iwa-chan. Earth to Iwaizumi Hajime! Lost in thought?" Oikawa waved a hand in front his face. 

"Hm? Oh yeah, I was lost in thought. Sorry." 

"What were you thinking about?" 

"My troublesome boyfriend." 

Oikawa smiled. One of those fake ones. "Good things, I hope?" 

"Nope. Horrible things." 

The smile fell. "oh.." 

"Tooru I was joking. Of course I was thinking good things about you." 

His boyfriend nodded, but turned his face away. Great. Iwaizumi was so clueless in these moments on what to say. If he asked Oikawa what was wrong, he would get yelled at or ignored. He simply didn't know how to help the one he loved. He reached out and placed a hand on Oikawa's face, turning it toward him. He gave him a kiss. It wasn't until that moment that he realized how little they'd been affectionate with each other lately. Maybe Oikawa was touch starved like he was. 

"Tooru~" 

Those brown eyes glistened. "Yes, Iwa-chan~?" 

"I've been very neglectful in my kisses, wouldn't you say?" 

The boy nodded. "Just a little bit." 

"What do you say I make it up to you? And fuck you right here, right now." 

Oikawa gasped. "Iwa-chan~ how scandalous!" 

"Shut up and take your clothes off." 

"You don't want to tease me first?" 

He growled. "I have no patience for foreplay. Now strip before I change my mind." 

The brunette wiggled his eyebrows as he took his shirt off. "Someone's needy~" 

"I told you to shut up." 

"Demanding aren-"

He roughly kissed Oikawa, his patience running thin. His hands ran down and squeezed the boy's ass. "Take your pants off." 

"Anything for you dear~" 

Finally they both had stripped themselves, and Iwaizumi was roughly slamming into his boyfriend. They both moaned loudly, having craved this kind of intimacy for awhile.

"Hnn~ right there Iwa-chan~" 

He thrusted into that specific spot. Oikawa cried out, tears forming in the corners of his eyes. He pulled out, exhausted. "Too rough?" 

His boyfriend panted. "No.. perfect... I can't.. feel my legs.." 

"I guess that's good, can't feel the pain in your knee now." He pressed a kiss to Oikawa's forehead. 

"Oh, I can feel that just fine. it's everything above my knees that's numb." 

He chuckled. "Oh well, I tried. Guess I'm never good enough for you, am I, Shittykawa." 

Oikawa smiled. A real smile this time. "You're perfect, Hajime." 

A trip to the beach had been a good idea after all. He hadn't seen Oikawa so relaxed in a long time. They spent the night enjoying the water and the stars. Eventually they headed back home, and had another round of sex. Maybe life was starting to look up again.


	6. Chapter 6

Oikawa POV 

Oikawa sat in the kitchen, head in his hands. Iwaizumi was at the store, which was good because he did not feel like talking. A piece of paper sat on the counter next to him. A drug test he had taken for Volleyball, with big red letters saying "failed". He'd been kicked off the team. All his hopes and dreams washed away. He thought his life had been bad before, but this was so much worse. He wiped the tears from his face, and walked over to the cupboards, grabbing out his bottle of pain medication. He took three pills. He was only supposed to take one a day, but he didn't care. His knee was bothering him, and so was his heart. He had to drown out the pain somehow. 

Footsteps entered the house, and the front door closed. Shit. Iwaizumi was home. He had to hide the drug test. He had to lie, say he was sent home early from practice because of his knee. He grabbed the paper and headed towards their room. 

"Why are you home, Tooru?" Iwaizumi hugged him from behind. "I'm glad to see you, but shouldn't you be at practice?" 

He gulped. The paper shook in his hand, and tears threatened to fall. He needed to get a hold of himself. "Sent me home early because of my knee. It's bothering me today." 

"Well that doesn't make sense, wouldn't you stay to watch anyways? Why did they send you home? Is it that bad?" 

"Er... yeah." 

His boyfriend stepped in front of him, raising an eyebrow. "Don't lie to me, Oikawa Tooru..... what's that paper for?" 

Shit. He shook his head. "It's nothing." He tried to step around, but was stopped, the paper yanked from his hand. 

"I'll see if it's, as you say, 'nothing'- oh my god. This is a drug test, that you failed." Iwaizumi looked at him, concerned. "Why did you fail?" 

He looked away. "I'm.. not... sure..." 

A hand slapped his face. "Don't try and hide it, just tell me the truth. Why did you fail the test Oikawa Tooru?" 

He bit his lip. The cat was out of the bag now. "I've been.. buying.. and using... uhh... cocaine." 

"Cocaine?! Are you serious?" 

He nodded. "And... meth once, when I couldn't find any crack..." 

"Have you been taking more of your prescription than you're supposed to?" 

".....maybe." 

Iwaizumi threw the paper to the ground, and Oikawa noticed the boy had tears in his eyes. "Why, Tooru? Because of your knee? Or have you been doing it before that? How long has this been going on?" 

"A year or so." 

"A year?! For fucks sake, why didn't you say anything?" 

"I didn't want you to... break up with me because of it." 

His boyfriend shook his head. "I'm not going to break up with you. We're going to get you help. Ok?" 

"Ok.... thanks, for.. not leaving..." He hugged Iwaizumi, his tears no doubt soaking his shirt.


	7. Chapter 7

Iwaizumi POV 

Two weeks had passed since Iwaizumi had found out about Oikawa's drug addiction. He had searched the whole apartment, throwing away any drugs he found. He had called a therapist to set up an appointment with Oikawa, hoping that would help him quit. He was doing everything he could think of. Oikawa had been clean for two weeks, but the boy was a mess. Withdrawals happened often, and his boyfriend was not pleasant to be around at those times. But they were getting through it. 

The door opened, and Oikawa stepped inside. The brunette had a scowl on his face, and he didn't say a word as he headed straight for their room. 

"Tooru, how did therapy go?" Iwaizumi stepped into their room. 

"Like shit. I don't want to go anymore. That woman makes me feel terrible. I hate her." 

He sat on the bed next to his boyfriend. "She's just trying to help you." 

"Well maybe I don't want her fucking help." 

Oh boy. Oikawa was having another of his withdrawals. He just had to keep calm, and try to distract the troubled boy. 

"Ok, let's do something else to distract you." He stood, and held out a hand. The brunette smacked it away. 

"Don't tell me what to do. You don't understand." 

"Then help me understand. I want to help you, Tooru." 

"Well I want you to fucking stop. I don't want help, I want to die." 

Iwaizumi gasped. "Don't you dare talk like that. You're just going through a withdrawal, and it's making you moody." 

Oikawa stood, angered. "Withdrawl? Well maybe I wouldn't be having withdrawals if someone hadn't thrown all my drugs away!" 

"We're trying to get you to stop! Keeping drugs in the house isn't going to make you stop!" 

His boyfriend slapped him. It stung not only his face, but his heart. Oikawa had never layed a hand on him before. "What was that for?" 

"I'm so sick of you trying to help me. I was doing just fine before you found out about it. But then you had to intervene and mess me up." 

"You're not yourself! I hate seeing you like this! If you get help, then you can start being yourself again!" 

Oikawa clenched his fist and Iwaizumi flinched. Was he going to punch him? "Fine. If you're sick of seeing me like this, then I'll leave." 

"No, no no no. Don't leave, Tooru. That'll make it worse." 

Another slap to the face. "I can fucking leave if I want to, now move out of my way. I need to grab my things." 

"No." 

"Excuse me?" 

He refused to let Oikawa leave. "I said no. You're not leaving." 

"Oh my god Iwaizumi, MOVE!" his boyfriend shoved him aside, into the wall. 

"Tooru, can you hear yourself? You're being violent!" 

"Oh, now you know how it feels!" 

He felt himself growing angry. "How it feels? I've never been violent with you! Yes, I've been aggressive but that's just how I am! I thought you liked me like that?" 

A book flew through the air towards his face. He ducked, and stated at Oikawa, shocked. "Did you just throw that at me?" 

This time it was a fist, slamming into his jaw, causing him to bite his tongue. His mouth filled with the taste of blood. He spit out a tooth. "STOP, OIKAWA!" 

"GET OUT OF MY LIFE!" Oikawa threw a bottle of shampoo at Iwaizumi, and he didn't have enough time to dodge it. It hit him in the chest, knocking the wind out of him. 

He leaned against the wall, gasping for air. Tears fell down his face. He couldn't believe this was happening. The man he loved would never do this. Oikawa's mind had been poisoned, warped by the drugs. He ducked as another object flew at him. 

"Ok stop! STOP! I've had enough! Fine! Leave!" 

Oikawa grabbed his bag of things, and stepped out, slamming the door behind him. Iwaizumi fell onto his bed, lifting his shirt to examine his chest. A large yellow and purple bruise had formed where the bottle had hit him. He let out a sigh, and winced. His jaw hurt a lot. He closed his eyes, praying it was all just a horrid dream. No. It was real. He couldn't find the strength to get up. So he layed there, staring at the ceiling, silently crying.


	8. Chapter 8

Oikawa POV 

Oikawa handed a wad of cash to the man in front of him. He was in the trashy part of town, and he was once again buying more cocaine. The man smirked and handed him a small box. 

"That should last you a while." 

He nodded. "Thanks." 

"No prob. You bring money, and I'll give you want you want." 

He walked down the street holding the box. The street was empty, and the homeless lived in the street. It was sad, really. Oikawa was just glad he wasn't in a situation like that. He had gotten himself a job, and rented out someone's attic. He missed Iwaizumi terribly, but if he went back, he would be back in that hell of therapy and withdrawals. No. This was better. 

He set his box down inside his house, and headed to work. The convenience store he worked at was usually pretty busy. But it sat empty today. If fact, there was a sign out front that said it was closed today. He called his boss. 

"Hello?" 

"Hey, why do you have me working today if it's closed?" 

"Its just closed for a few hours while all the employees take a quick drug test. The back door is unlocked, you can come in." 

A drug test? Oh no. "We're all getting drug tested today?"

"Yep." 

".....is it mandatory?" 

"Oikawa, what are you implying? That you wouldn't pass?" 

"...maybe." 

His boss sighed. "Don't bother then. If you know you're not going to pass, there's no point in taking it." 

He held his breath. "Does that mean you have to fire me?" 

"Yes. Sorry, Oikawa. But that's just how this works." The call ended, and he felt defeated. He turned around and headed back home. That was the second job he'd been fired from. The first one had fired one because he had passed out at work. It was because of a small overdose. He'd taken too many pain pills. When he couldn't afford cocaine, he would buy bottles of Ibuprofen. It wasn't the same, but at least it was something. He stopped in front of the bar. Should he get a drink, or go home and use some of that cocaine he just bought? If he waited to use it, it would last longer. He headed into the bar. 

"Hey there Oikawa! Your regular?" the bar tender greeted him, holding a bottle of the whiskey he usually ordered. 

"Yeah, thanks." He sat on a stool and waited. 

"What's the reason for coming in today?" he was handed a glass. He quickly drank it down. 

"Lost my job." He held out his glass for some more. The bar tender poured him another shot. 

"Oh shit, that's never good. Why'd they fire you?" 

"Told me I had to take a drug test." He finished off his glass. "Told them I wouldn't pass it." 

That seemed to surprise the man. "You're on drugs?" 

"Cocaine." 

"Fuck, Oikawa. I didn't know. You should.. that's not good." 

He sighed. "I know. I tried to get off it once, but... that didn't end well." 

The bar tender poured him yet another shot. "How did you try to quit?" 

"My boyfriend threw out everything and signed me up for therapy." 

"And that didn't work? Hmm. Maybe try getting something to replace it." 

Oikawa tilted his head, confused. "What do you mean?" 

"Well, obviously this ain't the same, but it's kinda similar. I used to be a chain smoker, three packs a day. My girlfriend at the time told me that if I didn't stop, she'd leave. She didn't like the smell of tobacco on my breath. I loved her, so I decided to quit. I found something to replace the cigarettes with. Chewing gum. Everytime I craved a cig, I chewed on gum instead. It took a few tries, but eventually I started to crave gum instead. To this day I still have an, addiction I guess to gum. But at least it's not something bad for me, and my breath always smells fresh." 

Oh that actually made sense. "But what about my addiction to alcohol? You think it would with that too?" 

The bar tender nodded. "Try something like tea, or coffee. Slowly get off of the alcohol." 

"Got any good recommendations of coffee?" He wasn't a huge fan of coffee, but he'd only had it a couple times. 

"Oh yeah. That small cafe down the street has really good brew. Hot and iced. I go there often." 

He finished his shot, and placed some cash on the table. "Thanks for the advice, I'll try that." 

"Let me know how it goes, I'm rooting for you." 

He laughed. "Thanks." He left the bar and headed straight home. The box of goods he just bought caught his eye. He groaned. His finger itched to open it up, but he fought it. He needed to sell this. And buy a LOT of chewing gum.


	9. Chapter 9

Iwaizumi POV 

Not a day went by that Iwaizumi didn't think about Oikawa. He would sit at home and wonder what the boy was up to. He missed him terribly. He'd called the brunette many times the past month, sent him several texts. He had gotten no answer, no reply. He just hoped that Oikawa was alright and well... still alive. He didn't want to think about that, but he knew that drug overdoses were common and deadly. 

"No. Tooru can't be dead, he's fine." saying it out loud didn't help as much as he had hoped. He needed to take a break, get some fresh air. He grabbed his keys and headed to the beach. 

The sun was bright, and the sand warm beneath his feet. He stared out into the water. He rolled up his pants and stepped into the waves. A deep breath of the salty air calmed his nerves. Being here without Oikawa was slightly painful, but it was better than being in the apartment. A small child and her mother played in the water near him. He watched, a small smile on his face. A slender male walked by them and the little girl ran up to him and showed the man some shells. After a moment, Iwaizumi realized the man was none other than Oikawa himself. He stepped closer, listening to the two interact. 

Oikawa squatted down, and grabbed the shells from the girl. "Oh these are lovely! Just like you~" 

The girl giggled, and her mother sighed. "I'm sorry sir, she insisted on showing 'the handsome man' her shells." 

Oikawa laughed, and Iwaizumi fought back tears. He hadn't seen his friend happy like this in a long time, especially not to the point of laughter. "It's quite alright, I'm used to girls fawning over me." The boy stuck out his tongue. The girl giggled again. 

"You can keep the shells mister! A present from me!" 

"Oh I couldn't! You picked these yourself, don't you want them?" 

She shook her head, her black pigtails jiggling. "I want you to have them!" 

"Well then I shall take good care of these precious shells, thank you sweetheart." 

Iwaizumi was shocked. It was almost like he was back in time, with the old Oikawa. What had happened? Was he dreaming? A shadow blocked the sun, and he looked up to see Oikawa standing next to him. 

"Didn't expect to find you here today, Iwa-chan." 

"I could say the same about you." 

"Could we maybe... talk?" he'd only seen his friend this awkward once before, and that was when he and confessed this feelings to Iwaizumi. 

"Yeah sure, let's go sit in the shade." 

They walked over to the small grouping of trees and sat down beneath them. Oikawa pulled a pack of gum from his pocket and took a stick out, putting in his mouth. 

"What would you like to talk about?" 

The brunette sighed. "Thought that was kinda... obvious." 

"Well it could be a number of things. About your addiction, or maybe it's about how you broke my jaw, or how bout the fact that you broke my heart and ignored me for over a month?" 

Oikawa winced. "I was hoping to.. talk about all of the above." 

Oh this was going to be interesting. "Alright, I'm listening." 

"Ok first of all, I'm so sorry. I was.. A mess. And I had no right to hit you. Or throw things at you. I feel guilty about that... It seriously broke your jaw?" 

He nodded. "A small fracture, yes." It had not been pleasant, trying to get that to heal. It still hurt to chew sometimes. 

"I'm very sorry Hajime. Is there anything I can do to-" 

He cut him off. "No, it's fine. You're sorry, that's good enough for me. I don't hold grudges." 

Oikawa smiled. "That means a lot to me, to know you've forgiven me." The male pulled out another piece of gum and started chewing it. "Ok, secondly, I want to apologize for not accepting your help. And for being a bitch about it. You were just trying to help me, and I was a dick." 

Iwaizumi didn't know what to say. He was so shocked. He didn't want to hear these apologizes, he wanted to know how Oikawa was doing. "Tooru, it's fine. I've forgiven you. You don't need to apologize. I just want to know if you're ok. What have you been doing all this time?" 

"Oh.. ok. I moved across town, closer to some drug dealers I knew. I got a couple jobs, but when they found out about my addiction they fired me. A friend of mine, the bar tender at the bar I visited frequently, gave me some advice. He, helped me find a way out." Oikawa pulled the pack of gum from his pocket again, and showed it to Iwaizumi. "I've been chewing gum everytime I feel a need for cocaine." 

Oh so that's what the gum was for? He had never thought of that, but he was glad it was working. "How long have you been doing that?" 

"I've been clean for about... two weeks I think. I'm still struggling with alcohol, but I'm working on it." 

His mind raced. Hope filled his heart. But he still had one question. "What made you change your mind?" 

Oikawa frowned. "My life was not at all what I wanted. I was in a dark place. I miss playing volleyball so bad. It was because of my own stupid decisions that I couldn't play. I thought that maybe if I got clean, i would have a chance to play again." The brunette turned those brown eyes to Iwaizumi. "And i thought that maybe if I got clean, you would love me again."


	10. Chapter 10

Oikawa POV 

"Love you again?" 

Oikawa nodded. "All I've ever wanted in life was for you to love me. And going over a month without it really tore me apart. If I make myself better, if I fix all my problems, do you think you can find it in yourself to love me?" 

Iwaizumi shook his head at him. "Oh Tooru, you really have lost your mind." 

His heart sank. He looked away, not wanting the man he loved so dearly to see him cry. "Oh I see." 

Strong arms wrapped around his waist and pulled him close. He tried to struggle away. "Oikawa, that's not what I meant. Let me explain." He turned and looked at Iwaizumi. 

"I'm listening." 

"You didn't let me finish. You must have lost your mind to think that I ever STOPPED loving you. I have always, and I will always love you. I know I don't say it very much, but it's true. If you believe in such ridiculous things as soul mates, I would say that you are mine." 

He couldn't help it. He sobbed. "Oh Iwa-chan, I think so too." He tackled his boyfriend to the ground and kissed him. He kissed that boy over and over. 

"Mnn Tooru.."

"Hmm?" 

"Your breath is very minty." 

They both laughed, and Oikawa smiled, taking in the beautiful sight of Iwaizumi Hajime. His heart swelled and he found himself tearing up again. Sure, his life was rough. He had his struggles and his flaws. But sitting there on the beach, looking at the one person he loved more than anything, he realized just how stupid he was to have ever taken those drugs. He didn't need them. Pain was a part of life, and it was these happy moments that made it all better. Who needed a strong substance, when he had the greatest boyfriend in the world. Iwaizumi was his new drug, and this time, he wasn't going to quit. 

The end.


End file.
